Last Night’s TV

The Great British Bake Off (BBC One, 8pm) seemed rather pleased with itself for engineering the controversy of last week, where Diana sabotaged Ian’s ice cream, resulted in a hissy fit, a binned ice cream and his dismissal. There was quite the furore about this amongst twee TV enthusiasts. It turns out Diana fell after this and damaged her olfactory nerve leading to a loss of smell and taste – which forced her to quit the competition. It seems karma was feeling particularly brutal when doling out its retribution for her iced espionage- perhaps it is a fan of twee TV too. You might have thought with Diana’s forced exit that the bakers would be given a reprieve from axing this week, but no, it was sayonara to my favourite, lovely Norman. Awww shame, he was so sweet but perhaps his pies weren’t.

I’m struggling a little bit with Sue’s presenting, it seems to get more cringey and annoying every week – someone needs to move her away from the sugary treats. I like Mel but I’ve been put off Sue since she made an “ooh matron” style mention of Mary Berry’s cherry earlier in the series, which left me decidedly uncomfortable. If there are some things that should be impervious to innuendo, surely a septuagenarian’s cherry must be amongst them.

I watched Our Zoo afterwards, which was charming and definitely had me hooked. It clashed with an Horizon investigating the “dark web” on BBC Two at the same time. I am most intrigued by the notion of a dark web. I think the web is pretty dark as it is: it’s mostly a seething cauldron of vitriol, misogyny and cat videos. If this is what our collective id looks like, it ain’t pretty. I can only imagine what goes on on the dark web. I will catch it iplayer and report back accordingly.

The Gypsy Matchmaker (Channel 4, 10pm) made for uncomfortable viewing, with a patriarch touting his 14 year old son Adrian around for marriage. The poor kid was forced to suffer the indignity of being called ugly by a man without a tooth in his head. Adrian was understandably smitten with Esme, a mesmerisingly beautiful 15 year old, but her gran roundly saw off the rather charmless overtures of Adrian’s dad. I wish luck to both Adrian and Esme.



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